Questions and Answers, Rules and Reasons

1. What is the most important thing? To meet in heaven.

2. How do we expect to do it? By living our vocations in Godís will.

3. What is our vocation? What is Godís will? How do we find out?

As Socrates said, "Know thyself." We change, but some of our aspects stay constant, and by rooting ourselves in our constant characteristics, we can make sense of our changes. As human beings, we are thinking animals and feeling entities with a moral sense. In other words, we are made up of a physical body, mental mind, and spiritual soul. Each has specific needs:

 

Physical: Sleep, Food, Water, Shelter, Clothing, Practical Skills

Psychological: Intellectual (Knowledge and logic)

Emotional (Love and Respect)

Life Skills

Spiritual: Relationship with God

Worshiping Together

Knowing the teaching of the Catholic Church

The inspirational example of Saints

 

Each one of these needs is met by following certain rules and guidelines:

Parentís Responsibilities Childrenís Responsibilities

Physical

Buy food, prepare food, teach cooking Eat what's put before you, learn to cook

Chose and buy clothes Take care of clothes (not left on floor)

Provide house Take care of house (esp. own room)

Teach practical skills (doing laundry, etc) Learn practical skills (use tools, etc.)

Use resources effectively

 

Mental: Intellectual

Provide books Learn in school

Teach life skills Learn life skills

(choosing friends, dealing with disappointments)

Learn more than is required in school

(picking career, contributing to society)

 

Mental: Psychological

Teach strategies for self-examination Learn to deal with emotions

Praise often and criticize gently Ask for help when you need it

Provide positive and negative consequences Honor your parents

Be fair and objective Use the "I" train - I feel ** when you **

Provide safety and security and I would like you to ** because **.

Provide roots and wings Learn social skills

Listen If not heard, repeat and rephrase

If not heard, repeat and rephrase Listen

Have fun together Have fun together

Provide constructive criticism Use conflict management skills

Contribute to society Learn to contribute to society

Donít take out my problems on you

 

Spiritual

Provide leadership for saying Grace Add special intentions

and bedtime prayers Listen to Adventures in Oddessy

Set good example Follow the good examples of the Saints

Drive to Sunday Mass, Confession, Behave at worship services

and Holy Days Religious Education

 

 

How the Rules get Specific

(Why is each one on this list?)

 

Chores:

For Yourself (you benefit and don't leave a mess for someone else to clean):

(these you have to do because you exist)

Homework

Practice your musical instrument (if you have one)

Clean your own room

Put everything (especially cloths and books) in its proper place (1/week)

Sweep, vacuum, and/or mop (1/month)

(it must be possible to walk through without stepping on something)

Clear your plate and silverware after meals

Clean up after yourself when you have a snack (put ingredients away,

stick dishes and glasses in sink, and wipe counter)

Hang up your jacket where it belongs

Put your clothes in the hamper

 

For the family (everyone benefits)

(some of these are mandatory, others are voluntary and paid)

Make meals (including putting away food afterwards)

Set the table, wiping it before and afterwards

Wash dishes

Dry and putting away dishes and silverware

Garbage

Take out the garbage (from inside to outside)

Tuesday night garbage takeout (to sidewalk)

Bring in garbage cans Wednesday (whoever is home first)

Water plants

Clean kitchen ($1)

Put everything away

Wipe all the countertops and appliances

Sweep the floor

Mop the floor

Cleaning bathroom ($1)

Wipe sink and tub

Clean toilet

Mop floor

Clean mirrors

Clean living room ($1)

Pick up any personal belongings and put them in owner's room

Sweep and mop

Wipe up dusty surfaces

Rake leaves ($2)

Mow lawn ($2)

Shovel walk and driveway ($1 per foot of snow)

Laundry (take turns)

Sort lights (hot) and darks (warm)

Put load of clothes in washing machine

Put load of clothes in dryer

Bring up clothes, fold them, and put them in owner's room.

 

Extras:

Home Improvement

Car

Anything I tell you to do when you're not doing anything while I'm working my buns off.

 

 

Dings and Fines

 

Consequences should be in line with infractions

 

Major: (forfeit allowance; grounded)

Throwing a temper tantrum

Hitting someone

Destroying something in anger or boredom

Lying

Breaking one of the ten commandments or some variation

Breaking civil laws

 

Minor: (1/40th of your allowance)

Not putting things back where you got them from

Not doing an automatic chore

Not doing a chore after being reminded

Not treating others as you want to be treated

Dropping your books or clothes on the floor

Leaving them there after I tell you to pick them up.

Using bad language

Not taking your dishes and silverware to the sink

when you get up from the kitchen table.

Being late without calling

(two minutes of work for each minute I don't know where you are)

(one minute of work for each minute of excused absence)

After no longer late for a long while (you show responsibility) then later curfew, but natural consequences (you still have to get up).

Not calling me when you get home from school.

Eating ice cream without finishing your milk.

Eating ketchup without eating tomatoes.

Eating french fries without eating potatoes.

Eating expensive food when other food is available.

Reading at the dinner table when others are present.

Talking on the phone during dinner.

 

What should we do with the accumulated fines?

    1. Give them to charity
    2. Have a pizza

 

Bings and Rewards

 

A reward for doing things right. Get one fortieth of your allowance extra for doing chores without being reminded. Same for doing something that everyone benefits (ie. folding clothes).